The Cost of High Standards

Most people admire high standards.

They rarely talk about what they cost.

When I was younger, I thought high standards were the whole game.

You worked harder, pushed further, refined until it was perfect - then moved the bar again.

It was simple: if you cared, you gave everything.

That mindset built a lot of the good in my life.

It got me jobs I probably wasn’t ready for, kept me training when I could’ve stopped, and

created opportunities I wouldn’t have had otherwise.

But over time, I started to see the shadow side.

The exhaustion that hides behind “I’ll just stay up a little later.”

The self-criticism that follows you home, whispering that good isn’t good enough.

The quiet resentment that builds when no one else seems to care as much as you do.

High standards are powerful.

But they can quietly erode joy, creativity, and connection - if you never learn when to stop.

I realised that yesterday, watching my wife and daughter run.

They weren’t chasing times or perfect form.

They were just running. Free.

And for a moment, I felt jealous - not of their fitness or their performance, but of their

freedom.

They weren’t trying to earn the moment.

They were just in it.

That’s what high standards can steal from you if you’re not careful:

The ability to feel content while you’re still in the process.

I’m not giving mine up - they’re part of who I am.

But I’m learning to balance them.

To know when excellence matters, and when it’s okay to exhale and say, this is enough for

today.

Because sometimes, the bravest thing a high performer can do isn’t push harder.

It’s to stop, look around, and remember why they started.

If you’re someone who lives by high standards - in work, sport, or life - but you’re

realising they come with a cost, that’s what I help people with.

Balancing performance with peace.